“We create a mask to meet the masks of others.
Then we wonder why we cannot love,
and why we feel so alone” – Brenda Shoshanna
We don’t need to wear our masks to hide our true emotions. Emotions like anger can be a mask to cover our pain. How do you handle your anger?
After doing Yada for a few years, I discovered I needed to take the elevator down from my anger and determine what I was really hiding from. I saw the need to remove some masks of my own. Working through my anger and pain, God showed me my call was to help others work through recognizing their disguises of pain. I went back to college, and after several years I have become a licensed professional counselor.
Anger presents itself in different ways. It can be expressed as outward anger such as rage. But it can also go underground and be expressed in depression or anxiety. When asked how we are doing, we often respond, “I’m fine.” We put on a smile and wear a mask of happiness when in reality, we are not.
Anger is like an engine warning light in your car. When the light is on, it is important to look under the hood to see what the real problem is. We may overreact to a simple incident in anger, but if looked at closely, it can be traced to a buried hurt or a painful event. We may also see or experience injustice, and anger rises up. Psalm 4:4 says, “In your anger do not sin, when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent.”
It is possible to be angry and not to sin but we must not let our anger go underground or spew out in rage above ground. How can we learn to allow anger to reveal the real pain of our heart? James gives the answer in 1:19, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring the righteous life that God desires.”
Sometimes we need to share with someone the painful memories we have stored in our hearts. Who can we turn to share the inner hurts we carry?
All the anger management skills won’t help control our anger if the deep wounds are not exposed and brought into the light for healing. Anger in itself is not a sin, as many believe. It is what we do with our anger that will lead to healing or to sinful behavior. A question we must ask ourselves when anger rises up is “What am I really upset about?” If you cannot figure out the answer on your own, take your hurts to God. The steps are easy.
- Read His Word
- Journal honestly what you are feeling and what you think God is saying through scripture
- Share with a safe Yada group.
Hopefully you can allow God to reveal the submerged emotions and bring them out so the masks of anger can be removed. Removing all our masks can allow us to reflect all God has created us to be in vulnerability. Share your hidden hurts with God and Yada Sisters or Brothers today. By taking off our masks, we give permission for others to do the same, while we all become liberated in the process!